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02 November 2007 @ 02:04 pm

I was just looking over our blogs, and the latest entry came from Auzelle almost 2 weeks ago. I think everyone's beginning to feel a bit busy and stressed out if I'm not mistaken.I just finished up my two papers for the semester, and wow, I'm beat! 

However, I do have some good news! Firstly, there is a chance I might get a second article published. My paper on Ellen Glasgow's "Whispering Leaves" is being peer reviewed now, so I'm hoping that it makes the cut ;) Secondly, I'm going to the American Literature Conference in San Francisco in May of 2008, and I'm going for FREE!!! Yep, that's right ladies, Clayton State has now officially paid for over $2,000 worth of my travel expenses for the 3 conferences I've attended thus far. Basically, I've taken my first 4 Master's classes for free if you add up how much they've given me for travel funding. Great, huh?

Somehow, I keep expecting to hear an echo of my own voice as I'm writing this, because there's a chance it may be a good while before anyone gets back with me to let me know how you all are doing at the moment. I miss everyone, it's been really lonely these past months. I'm ready for Thanksgiving break, which is only 10 more school days away, roughly equaly to about 85 hours at work and 10 more at school for me, not that I'm counting!

So, in keeping with this idea the lonely but happy place in my life, I came to a realization recently. After signing on to match.com, because, according to Dr. Phil, "it's ok to look," I've decided that what I really want, after it's all said and done, isn't to get into a relationship. Honestly, I dont even think that I want to date. I think a lot of my frustration with where I'm at has been rooted in the fact that I'd just like some companionship, and I guess I always thought the rememdy was through dating. What's been so hard is seeing everyone go. Kelly will be leaving, Dana is at grad school, Auzelle is at school... all of us have our own busy and demanding lives, and I'm a working adult with a child and an academic career. Can we say "isolation nation" anyone? I think now that I've owned the fact that I'm lonely and that it is really painful (no matter how grateful I am for where I'm at), I've really begun to learn a lot of things about that. After getting dozens of responses from match.com, I realized that even the guys I found attractive/interesting didn't really interest me. Not really. Not in the "I'm afraid to begin a new relationship or meet people" way, I mean more like I dont see that as such a fulfilling part of life anymore. What I want, like I've wrote here before, is someone to spend time with who can appreciate what I like, who's a good person, and who wants to be as good of a friend to me as I can to be to them. All of you, ladies, have done a great job of that. I dont think that romance is exactly all it's cracked up to be. Sometimes all a girl needs is just someone to hang out with-- forget candles and dating.

This isn't my declaration of becoming anti-dating, it's more that I really see how that I think I'm doing just fine as I am. It's such a bloody and raw process to learn about yourself, and now I think that anyone else in the picture would detract from my hard-won indepedance and success, unless I really want him, that is ;) Who knows what'll happen? But I'm not going to worry so much about not having prospects. I got the chance to see what it'd be like, and I can honestly say that I didn't care for it.

All I really want is to see all you more often.

love Anna

 
 
05 September 2007 @ 01:44 pm
Ladies,

So I went through and made a list of all of my poems I've written this year, the grand total came to 18. As I was going through the titles, I began to see a common theme: Greece. Go figure, right?? Who'da thunk it?

This is what I'm thinking-- I'm going to keep the poems that pertain to Greece in their own little pile and use these to begin putting together a manuscript since I've got a traceable theme to work from. 13 out of the 18 are about Greece, or Greek culture, or my experiences in traveling there, or about the guy I love who lives there. I think I can keep producing work that relates to Greece because it is such a big part of my life. Plus, when I go back in December, I'll have even more to work from.

I've struggled with not making my writing career move fast enough, but I came to realize that I'm doing exactly what I need to be doing, which is....

WRITING CONSISTENTLY!! Everything is starting to take a life of it's own. Whatever I write that wont really work within the Greece theme I'm just going to try to get published in literary magazines. I'm telling all of you that when you can really separate the art from the business, when you only worry about getting that story or poem out of your soul first, then you'd be surprised at what you're able to start working with. 13 poems already about an idea I didnt realize I kept writing about?? Only about 50 more to go...

Anna
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25 March 2007 @ 08:57 pm

A confluence of city-states

 

“Dig it out for yourselves.”

                                    - Spartan response to an envoy requesting earth and water for Xerxes I

 

In truth,

Lacedaemon wells cry echoes

loudly as Athenian chasms.

Replicated experiments yield

same results

when time tested--

arms

crucified on beams of air

tear as wildly as bones

if flicked from balance.

 

Binaries merge,

conjoin.

Like malformed womb spittle

with odd numbered limbs

to a single heart

that vibrates

in ecstatic rebellion

of death sucking away

rhythm.

 

Convergence?

Just thick as clay.

Unmeshed as derisive gods

to fist shaking humans.

 

Walls packed

with such hesitant mortar

funnel all too well.

 
 
25 March 2007 @ 08:10 pm
All this crazy, blood, battle, Greece and Persian poetry is really starting to get to my head. I'm getting obsessed, you guys, and it's fabulous! I have an idea for a book of poetry now about this period in history, or perhaps, maybe even several different periods of history. I'm thinking of turning my focus onto this full force and trying to write something at least once a day. I want to call my book "Golden Death March." 
Good God I'm so damn morbid! 
What's really great though is that it's actually very freeing. Death is so heavy that sometimes when you release just a little bit through disgusting honesty and own your sick fascination, you find that you're beginning to let go of it a bit. It's very much a catharsis-like experience, and I feel that I'm really growing from it.
Also, this is somethign that I'm so excited about that I want to do it reguarly. Instead of turning on the TV after I finished my day and mentally chiding myself for not writing on my novel for the 48th day in a row, I cant wait to sit down at the computer and start hacking my thoughts away into some poetic form. I compare it to exercise-- don't you find you are much more successful when you are doing something you like?? no matter at what pace or in what form??
 
 
Current Mood: creativecreative
 
 
24 March 2007 @ 09:19 pm

The Thrice-Named Judas

 

Balancing disproportions

and shuffling history along

a 10 kilometer pass that transforms

to a slender necklace

elsewhere.

A handful of something

twitches

inside a head that spawns

possibilities to barter.

 

To speak then

into foreign ears so fragile

as to ingest double-edged swords?

An empire bends through mountains,

listens.

 

Snake tongue roads

are wedged in

breasts of rock.

Roaming eyes are mute--

not deaf.

Zephyr stirs in branches.

 

Calming fear

with ladle-fed truths,

he brings torrents,

deluges, in arrows.

A generation

sucks in a breath,

trips backwards to away.

Immortals veering

left, taste blood spat

of Phocian veins

draining to the sea

that watches, silent.

 

Recorded as thrice named Judas.

Nightmare. Traitor. Ephialtes.

 
 
Current Mood: pensivepensive
 
 
 
20 March 2007 @ 12:33 pm
Sign in to read this. Seriously, do it.
 
 
Current Mood: excitedexcited